The Ricker might watch our children someday.

Which is why my wife and I came up with some (initial) ground rules for this occasion.

The Ricker must remain fully clothed at all times. This includes sleeping, walking around the house and taking a hot tub. I'd like the Ricker to keep his shirt on, too, but that may be too much to ask.

The kids can eat what they want. No limits on cheese, no soy milk, three meals a day, plus snacks if they want. The Ricker can keep to his one meal a day schedule if he wants.

No kid pilates, or kid aerobics, or mandated kid exercise.

Chores will be limited. One of my favorite Ricker quotes: "I had kids because I couldn't have slaves."

Let the kids talk. It's not like the Ricker has rules against this, but he has a technique where he manages to fill all the open air with his talking. I'm sure my kids won't want to hear about what he ate for dinner, or how he saved $2 on his car wash.

The kids aren't allowed to mix drinks. Besides, it's tough to mix a good "Ricker."

More to come . . .